Bucket List

I obviously don't have a clue what God has in store for me in 2015. But I know that there are things He wants me to overcome. Times He wants me to climb out of the nest, step onto the branch and then jump. The nest is so comfortable though and if everyone would just come to it they could be comfortable too. However this isn't how it works. No one, no thing, no event is going to come to me, I must go. So I decided to compile a list of a few of the situations or people or events God is calling me to. It would be rather easy to just sit here and say I'll wait for God to show me what He wants me to do, but the truth is, I'm going to guess, He already has. Countless times. Now is the time to write them down, make plans, and put plans in action. Do something. Anything.

I am more than aware that many, many things will happen throughout the course of the year to steer my plans. Things will likely not work out like I intended. That's OK. So long as in the end they work out how God intended. My plans are often, not His plans. Often He has other ways of doing things and as long as I stay close to him, he will reveal those plans to me and I can make adjustments. But I have to know where I'm starting. What are some things I know that I need to be doing or working on?

We'll start with the obvious. The purpose of this whole blog: Working on my fitness.

God doesn't just want, but needs me to be healthy to accomplish anything else I might list on my 2015 bucket list. Most all of the things will require some kind of going or doing. God wants me to let go of all my plans to lose weight and listen to him. To trust him. To wake up each morning and ask him to help me make good decisions regarding my health that day. Then the crazy part, he actually expects me to make those good decisions. He expects me to be active and to eat foods that give me the energy to be active. To eat foods that help prevent diseases. Should weight loss be a result of all of this, I believe so. I don't believe I can function to the best of my ability the size that I am now. So weight loss is a goal. Do I dare put a number on the year... I will say 45 pounds. That is beyond doable! I should be able to double that. But 45 would put me at my pre-pregnancy weight and that was oh, 16 years ago. I've never seen it since. So for this I will set fitness and food goals each week to try and help keep me disciplined. God will help me, is helping me overcome my addiction to sugar and food in general.

Belize! Devin and I are planning to go back to Belize this summer. I am so excited about this journey. Which is rather surprising to me considering how I felt when I left last year. I think I thought financially it was a once in a lifetime opportunity and I didn't want to get my hopes up about going again. I don't know if this will be the last time or if there will be many more to come. So I need to make this one count. I think I spent too much time worrying about the details beforehand and while I was there last year. The unknown just terrifies me. That's not to say I didn't absolutely love the people I met along the way and enjoy my time there, because I did. But to be honest I know there is so much more if I will allow God to help me overcome my need to plan. My need to stick to a schedule. My need to know every minute what is going to happen next. I believe this is something the people of Belize can really help me learn! ;)  And in learning this I will learn something much more valuable than just living life without watching the clock. I think this holds the key to really living life. To see needs along the way. To build relationships with people. To just everything. When you aren't bound by a clock you have time for anything. Now, like anything else you can take this too far the other way too. I don't foresee this being an issue with me ;)

To dream. To dream with God. To dream about things that don't seem possible and try to figure out how God could use me to get them done. To build my confidence in myself, through God. I believe the healthier I get the more confident I get. I don't by any means want to become prideful or cocky. I want to have the confidence to serve God in any way God calls me to serve. To not second guess. To not feel there must be someone else better qualified. Not to say I won't ask, but to accept the reality that I'm it sometimes. He really does want to use me for things. I pray that God helps me overcome my insecurities, my fear... of literally everything. Not being good enough, making the wrong choice, saying the wrong words, messing up, overstepping, stepping on toes, being too loud, not saying enough... you get the idea. I have a fear of everything. This keeps me wrapped up in my nest tighter than any other thing I can possibly list here.

For the most part this list is so general and just the beginning. I realize the possibilities of what God might actually have planned are endless. To me that's the beauty. I know these are the things He's been speaking loud and long to me about. This is the year to make much progress in these areas. So here is to a #NoFearNewYear!

***I haven't personally used this but in our small group we are doing Jennie Allen's study "Restless". Here is her dream guide to give some guidance with your dreaming; Dream Guide